Dear Molly of September 1st, 2013

Dear Molly of September 1st, 2013,

      Can you believe it? That crazy idea to start a blog panned out indeed. It's been four years. Four years of pain, joy, numbness, self-doubt, and self-discovery.

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      Well, you have a new diagnosis. In addition to anxiety and depression, you recently learned you have a form of ADHD. That was almost a relief to find out; a justification of sorts for some of your academic struggles. Adding a few more letters to the alphabet soup of Molly isn't such a big deal. Hopefully, now your meds are properly adjusted.

      You're still a procrastinator and a Night Owl. Two things you're working to change. 

      You still love Long Beach. It's a great place to live, no doubt. Although you harbor mixed feelings about magnet programs, you are very proud to be a Poly alum. It was a hard fight to get there.

      Although high school left a lot to be desired, you're moving forward. You still feel misunderstood and tend to over think things, but that's just how it is. It's just how you are. 

      The biggest thing you've come to know since starting college is that for the most part,  people actually do like you. You're not thought of or remembered as weird or annoying. People appreciate your sense of humor; you do have a knack for making everyone laugh. That's just an innate trait you're lucky to have. And you're perceived as intelligent. That's something you didn't understand for a long time. You don't have to be a standout hotshot in everything to have innate gifts. And you do. 

      Your critical thinking skills have gotten you far, and will continue to do so. Just because your with spatial reasoning is bordering on subpar, your algebraic gifts are uncommon. You can word problem with the best of them. You have a knack for literary analysis.

      Your passion and drive have taken you far.

      Your love for orchestra is something that will never change. It's been 11 years since you signed up to do violin at Emerson. And since then, you've stuck it out. Three years with no less than four teachers at school and three separate private teachers, and you still kept it up. A blow to your ego in sixth grade didn't completely kill your confidence. Mrs. Brinker at Stanford helped you understand that you actually do have musical gifts, and Lisa Lewis helped you to reach your fullest potential. Mr. Osman knew what you were capable of achieving. And now you know that music is where your heart lies, and where you make the greatest friends. 

      You've found your home in ice skating, and have maintained your strong ties to the Jewish community. You're speaking Spanish comfortably enough in the real world. But most of all, your blogging has changed your world for the better. 

      The more you write, the more people read what you have to share. And sharing your story is something you'll never stop doing. 

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      Oddly enough, adding a song to every blog has been one of your favorite parts. Float On by Modest Mouse is one that you love to sing, and that has kept you calm when you need comfort in the form of music. 

     We'll all float on okay, no matter what. 

Float On, by Modest Mouse 

I backed my car into a cop car the other day
Well, he just drove off - sometimes life's okay
I ran my mouth off a bit too much, ah what did I say?
Well, you just laughed it off and it was all okay

And we'll all float on okay
And we'll all float on okay
And we'll all float on okay
And we'll all float on anyway, well

A fake Jamaican took every last dime with that scam
It was worth it just to learn some sleight of hand
Bad news comes, don't you worry even when it lands
Good news will work it way to all them plans
We both got fired on, exactly, the same day
Well, we'll float on, good news is on the way

And we'll all float on okay
And we'll all float on okay
And we'll all float on okay
And we'll all float on alright

Already we'll all float on
Now don't you worry we'll all float on alright
Already we'll all float on alright
Don't worry we'll all float on

Alright, Already
And we'll all float on alright
Already we'll all float on alright
Don't worry even if things end up a bit
Too heavy we'll all float on alright

Already, we'll all float on alright
Already, we'll all float on okay
Don't worry, even if things get heavy
We'll all float on alright

Already, we'll all float on
(Alright!)
Now don't you worry, we'll all float on
(Alright!)
We'll all float on

Love, Molly