Dear Molly,
So you've made it. The year of hell that was 10th grade is officially behind you. You're a junior now; alive and kicking, back with vengeance. Sure you're scarred for life. You've learned about the good, the bad, and the ugly of life and growing up. Let's break it down.
The Good:
You know myself very well. You know that you're sociable and shy all rolled into one. You know that you have perseverance; you have since kindergarten when Ms. Peterson, the best kindergarten teacher in the history of kindergarten taught twenty 5-year olds the meaning of that word and its utmost importance. You know what you love; music, writing, family, diversity, community, loyal friends, and those with not just surface sympathy, but deep empathy.
And the Bad:
You know what you hate: conceited stuck-up pseudo-friends, people who simply choose not to care or understand, violence and anger, and above all: loneliness. You know it really well.
And the Ugly to Beat all Uglies:
Depression. The long slippery slope that you just can't seem to crawl away from. A deep, dark hole that goes on for miles and miles, months and months with no end in sight. The feeling that nobody will ever understand what you're going through.
It's been over 6 months since the last update. You're 6 months older and 6 months wiser. You survived crippling depression, extreme loneliness, and serious understimulation. You made it through Opportunities for Learning, 2 weeks of day treatment at UC Irvine, and summer school. You're about 2 months into junior year at Millikan.
So life keeps moving. It always will, through good times and awful times, joy and sadness, smiles and tears.
Song of The Day: Wake Me Up by Avicii
Feeling my way through the darkness
Guided by a beating heart
I can't tell where the journey will end
But I know where to start
They tell me I'm too young to understand
They say I'm caught up in a dream
Well life will pass me by if I don't open up my eyes
Well that's fine by me
So wake me up when it's all over
When I'm wiser and I'm older
All this time I was finding myself
And I didn't know I was lost
I tried carrying the weight of the world
But I only have two hands
Hope I get the chance to travel the world
But I don't have any plans
Wish that I could stay forever this young
Not afraid to close my eyes
Life's a game made for everyone
And love is the prize
So wake me up when it's all over
When I'm wiser and I'm older
All this time I was finding myself
And I didn't know I was lost
Didn't know I was lost
I didn't know I was lost
I didn't know I was lost
I didn't know (didn't know, didn't know)
You're finding yourself. You're feeling awake, alive, and ready to tackle whatever what ever comes at you.
Love, Molly
